Blessings, beautiful souls —
October has only just begun, and we have already been thrust into the most incredible portals:
Pair this with the insane healing (emotional, mental, physical, and spiritual) that has begun to unravel in this month and you’ve got quite the magical concoction going on. I almost wrote a newsletter with a reading for the Collective, but I heard, “not only are you navigating a cold, but when was the last time you read just for you? Why does everything need to be in service? Don’t you deserve to harness these energies, as well?” So, I decided to pull some cards for the portal to write about them, here. Following that, I’m going to dive into the theme that has also been unraveling in my own life this month.
10 in the Major Arcana is fittingly the Wheel of Fortune, and, Lord, the karma wheel be karma-wheelin’, this month. Pages are turning and we are being forced to live within this new book that is being written. It may not be clear as to how we successfully embody and exist within these changes, but we don’t really have a chance to think twice about it. We just gotta do.
A card to represent the energy of the portal – TWO OF CUPS
I cackled when I pulled this one. This is literally the card that summarizes how all of October seems to be unfolding for me, and it is a card that perfectly represents literally all my daily pulls this past week. The energy of this card represents unity without self-abandonment. And while it normally represents two souls meeting in union (I consider it the ultimate soulmate card, personally), on a personal level, it also represents the unity of all those parts of myself that I have been navigating lately, all those identities, all those titles I’ve been gifted – coming together, fusing together, assimilating without the need to perform. This card is about sitting in the energy of Love, as it is. Just be in that energy.
Where should I put my focus during and following this portal? – KEEPER (KING) OF PENTACLES
I am being called to inhabit what I have built. But I suppose that first takes recognition and gratitude for what I have built. My home, my business, my creative passions, my children, they all deserve my presence right now – and this is something I have been navigating lately. I have not been stressing about service to others and have instead tried, consciously, to put myself and my needs first (especially as I navigate a cold right before/during this portal – it forces me to slow down and rest).
In addition, the guidebook for this particular deck says I am a “master legacy holder” but I am being called to then share what I have built: teach others, invite others in, guide others – without broadcasting all I have built, in the process. To me, I read this as: Only once I have become rooted in the gratitude of all I have built for myself am I able to confidently share this with others in a way that benefits and assists the Collective. It is therefore essential that I root myself in all I have become rather than looking for endlessly becoming more.
What must I heal to move forward confidently through this portal? – TWO OF SWORDS
I need to trust my discernment without needing to know every outcome. Essentially, I don’t trust myself enough. I have inner knowing, and yet I hesitate to listen to the whispers — why? The guidebook says this card mirrors the High Priestess (a frequent pull for me, lately), and represents protecting my heart by avoiding confidently declaring my decision. Essentially, I’m being told that to remain stagnant or at a stalemate is just as dangerous to my heart than just declaring my truth.
What does the collective need as we move through this portal? – TWO OF PENTACLES
The message is clear: the Collective needs sustainable spirituality. The Collective does not need another demand to ascend, transform, achieve, or constantly improve. It needs to learn how to move through life’s responsibilities without losing its sense of equilibrium. This really aligns with my message about performance – it’s dropping away, it’s disintegrating; all the performative spirituality is losing its momentum for something that is long-lasting and real. In the guidebook, it emphasizes that life (and spirituality) is not about doing it all but about prioritizing what matters. Who are you when the veil of who you think others want you to be is lifted?
What else do we need to know about the portal? – SEEKER (KNIGHT) OF PENTACLES
It’s time for us to remain devoted to our path. The value of this portal is not measured by what happens today; it is measured by what we commit to doing tomorrow, next week, and in the months ahead. Small, intentional actions are just as spiritually meaningful as profound revelations and hopeful leaps. The guidebook speaks to commitment to your path – even when the path seems dull or curiosity makes you feel you need to be doing more. Progress may feel invisible sometimes, but it’s happening, it’s moving, you’re growing in the right direction.
Curiosity pull (just pulled another card because… why not?) – INITIATE (PAGE) OF PENTACLES
Incredible final card – a new beginning, held up by the curious student of life. It suggests that even after reaching a place of maturity or mastery, we are invited to remain teachable. In the guidebook, it speaks to the willingness to become something new – and that is exactly where this portal is taking us.
Now, to speak to some interesting points in this reading…
- The trio of 2s – I really thought we might get another 2 at the end, there, but it’s clear that fire is not a part of this portal. It’s all about settling in within ourselves and letting it flow, not forcing ourselves into action. Our balance here needs to be with our emotional, physical, and mental selves – it’s not about Spirit, right now. That will unfold on its own.
- The Pentacles Courts – Though in a reverse order, bringing us from wisdom keeper to student, there is a theme of soul maturation and rooted acceptance in who we are and who we are becoming. With the Queen being absent, this portal is really saying: keep emotions out of identity, right now.
- Back to no Wands in this spread – no urgency to act, no fiery push to transform, no insistence on doing more. Just be.
- The large presence of Pentacles (earth) really aligns with my ever-growing connection to my Spirit Dragon.
- A theme emerges: You do not need to become more to be worthy of what you are creating. Bring your spiritual understanding into your daily life; make peace with the decisions that have remained unresolved. Honour your responsibilities without abandoning your own needs. Continue learning, continue cultivating (not with a need to become more, but just out of curiosity), and allow your growth to unfold at a sustainable pace. One thing that I have had to learn recently is that sometimes I can just do things – or not do things – just because I want to – or don’t want to. I don’t need a reason, a grand purpose, or an end goal.
But now I will share how October has been unfolding for me, and the healing that occured/is occuring leading up to this portal. I remind you that tarot is not a tool for divination but is a way to understand your subconscious and the energies you are holding/will be working with in that day. It’s impossible to deny the accuracy of tarot as you will soon see my explain.
October 6 — Four of Wands + The Sun
This represents completion, happiness, and something coming into the light – a homecoming. The Four of Wands represents reunion, celebration, and a place of belonging. Looking back, it’s especially poignant because I knew something was coming but didn’t know what. I just welcomed it (in my heart) and let it unfold.
October 7 — Seven of Wands + Six of Cups
This is particularly striking in retrospect… the Six of Cups is a symbol of nostalgia, childhood connections, and people from our past. When I pulled it, I heard, “Someone from your past will email you.” My ears blocked. I said to myself, “This is something intense,” and had a feeling of who it might be. Paired with the Seven of Wands, the message is that revisiting the past requires boundaries, courage, fortitude, and truth. I received an email on this day (Canada time).
October 8 — The Lovers + Three of Pentacles
The Lovers represents profound connection that doesn’t require us to abandon ourselves in the process. It is a card of soulmates. The Three of Pentacles brings collaboration: people consciously working together to (re)build something that will not crumble following its careful development; something rooted, something worthy. This requires accountability, responsibility, and genuine investment. After eight years of silence, it is broken. The first emails exchanged.
October 9 — Four of Wands + The Hanged Man
The Four of Wands returns, but now accompanied by a change in perspective. Homecoming shows its face again, and truly the first exchanges felt like a return home. Perhaps this was the last piece of the Canadian puzzle for me – the last and most important thing I needed to heal. In any case, all of it feels significant. The reunion remains (with the Four of Wands), but we both begin to understand that reconciliation doesn’t require returning to the relationship exactly as it existed before – but what existed before requires our inverted perspectives and generous healing. The Hanged Man asks us to release old expectations and consider a new structure that honours who we’ve both become and the apologies we both needed. We did exactly that.
October 10 — Ace of Cups + The Lovers
And here we arrive at today’s portal, and the Lovers has returned. Soulmates. This union can be honoured with new boundaries, accountability, and respecting who we have become. Because, in tears as I write this, we are soulmates. There is nothing that can cut that tie. It is bound, wound, bonded in the aether. There is so much learning we had to do – together, separate, and now, perhaps together again – but it was all part of what we agreed to. I know that now, and I think she does as well. We know that now.
And the most beautiful thing? Ace of Cups – the card that represents reconciliation with estranged family members. She was my family – is my family. The love never stopped flowing, the cup was always waiting to be shared; if it was never reconciled in this lifetime, it would have been divided between us in the aether when we returned to one another knowing that the only thing that exists between us is love. Always Love. Only Love. The rest is noise – Love is the most important. The Lovers returns, but the Three of Pentacles has become the Ace of Cups. Yesterday’s emphasis on building and understanding gives way to emotional renewal. For both of us…
The Ace of Cups is a beautiful symbol of forgiveness, emotional openness, and love that can be expressed freely again. Forgiveness has been my life’s theme, and I need to forgive myself for not being there, for drifting away, for letting this soulmate connection disintegrate when I should have planted it, tended to it, watered it with the flowing love from the Cup. And when I felt that I wasn’t cared for, I should have had the strength to say it. Instead, I was a coward. And I forgive all I projected onto her, as well. It is all forgiven. There is only love that remains.
This journey has amplified healing in three particular Chakras:
- Heart Chakra – This is obvious, but I’m healing my inner child (which has been an overarching theme over the last two months) with this – I’m honouring her, her truth, and the truth of my friend’s inner child.
- Throat Chakra – We are both speaking our truth without fear of isolation, rejection, or abandonment.
- Solar Plexus Chakra – We both have the courage to remain open without that fear of abandonment. This is the Chakra of connection and community.
And all of these are reflected in my daily pulls:
- Six of Cups: Inner-child healing and revisiting the past.
- The Lovers: Choosing connection consciously. Soulmates.
- Three of Pentacles: Learning to communicate and rebuild together.
- The Hanged Man: Releasing old perspectives.
- Ace of Cups: Allowing emotional renewal.
- Four of Wands: Creating a foundation where love and boundaries coexist. A homecoming – back to one another.
And now, the theme emerges in my portal reading: Two of Cups is the energy for the portal. Soulmates. LOVE. LOVE ABOVE ALL ELSE. This is the theme. This is the portal’s focus. LOVE. We are all meant to learn how to let love in our lives without losing ourselves (or becoming obsessed with the outcome) in the process. Love can exist alongside personal sovereignty.
Healing does not require us to forget, reconciliation does not require us to return to who we once were, and forgiveness does not require us to abandon the boundaries we have worked so hard to establish. We can honour the past, embrace who we have become, and allow love to exist in a new form. We do not need to force an outcome or understand where the journey will take us. We only need to remain open, honest, and present. Love does not ask us to abandon ourselves. It asks us to show up as ourselves. And I think we both feel seen – and united in Spirit through this new lens of Love.
If you wish to support my work further, have a look at all my books, journals, and decks, available here. If you want to work with me as a spiritual healer or wish to have a tarot reading with me, check out my services through Seeking Celestial Grace and Awakened Little Souls.
xx C
